


the nights as dark as my baby, and half as beautiful too

by raincallsx



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, Idiots in Love, Post Darillium, Stealing Space Ships, The TARDIS Ships It (Doctor Who)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 09:15:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24348607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raincallsx/pseuds/raincallsx
Summary: river goes looking for an escape, but finds something much better.
Relationships: Twelfth Doctor/River Song
Kudos: 31





	the nights as dark as my baby, and half as beautiful too

**Author's Note:**

> for nina martin 
> 
> stan them for clear skin
> 
> title from as it was by hozier

The scent of the console room was one of River’s favorite parts of walking into the TARDIS. The air would hit her in a gentle puff. It was hard to describe the scent. If you had been there, you would know what she meant. A sort of deep ozone-like base with notes of things bright like a citrus fruit delicately plucked from a tree by practiced hands, or maybe a soft whiff of vanilla from the board of a baker ever so carefully measuring ingredients with an outpouring of love in their heart, and maybe a touch of champagne shared on a day too good to last very long at all. The scent of time was funny. It smelled like actual moments somehow. If you concentrated hard enough, you could see the scenes play out in your head with great detail. River supposed it could be a sort of time lord thing, she never did bother to ask anyone else about it…

Nevertheless, the air hit her with a soft familiarity similar to falling into bed after a long day. A step into the console room, and then another. Her heeled boots clicked softly against the flooring. Looking around, she determined that it was likely that nobody was home. That was good for her. She needed a little break.

She shed her fur coat (faux replication,  _ thank you very much),  _ and her beaded clutch, tossing them both onto the jumpseat with little care for exactly how they landed. It didn't take long for her to whirlwind around the TARDIS console, flipping switches, turning dials, and pressing buttons with a quiet and practiced ease. The only real noise emanated from the click of her soles against the floor.

When the final lever was pulled, she let out a soft sight and bowed her head. She slumped forwards a bit as she took a deep breath. Her shoulders sagged beneath a delicate layer of purple silk. The light in the room was low, but enough to cast shadows across her face.

Some days, she stole the TARDIS for adventure. Running to it with open arms in need of an escape of some sort. Others, she stole it to run away. She would camp out in the time vortex for a few days, just taking a much needed breath of fresh air before she ventured back into the cruel universe. This situation was one of the latter. 

Leaving Darillium, she had known where she was going. She knew what she was doing. Then again, she was selfish. Even if that was the last time for him, she would be damned if she let it be the last time for her. She stole moments where she could. Feigning youth for the Doctor with a bow tie, just for  _ one last date. _ That's what she always told herself. She wanted more time, as much as she could get without ripping apart the universe. She found the pretenses to be too much as of late. She was so tired.

As she straightened her back, and stepped away from the console, River smiled at the room. 

“One last vacation from the world, old girl? Just you and I.” fingers tapped the railing beside her with a languid sort of longing.

She needed this. She knew that moving on would have to happen eventually. She was old enough to accept that now. It was strange, just as she left the decades of finally not pretending any longer, she went right back to it. She wished it was a Friday. River had always liked Fridays. You always took the best naps then, or at least, that's what he would say to her as he tugged her back into bed. 

She had grown tired of running. She was getting too old for it. 

She squeezed perfectly manicured hands into fists, then. Trying to squeeze away the thoughts with her hands. River was about to turn when a voice fell over her, giving her a start at first, before it washed her with a soft burst of relief she had not felt since she had left Darillium.

“Where do you get off, breaking into people's TARDISes, young lady?” 

“I only like to do it when nobody is home,” she replied, turning around to face the source of the voice.

The Doctor was leaning against the frame to the hallway. He looked just as she had left him (well not  _ just  _ but quite close enough). His jacket was left unbuttoned, his hair carefully in place, and his eyes… well, that was the best part of him.

Maybe it was a dream. It definitely wouldn't be the first. Perhaps she had already floated into the TARDIS and into her bed, or possibly even his, dreaming of the thing she wanted most. Anything would make more sense then if the reality was he was standing before her. She knew that was supposed to be the last time, that night on Darillium. That was it for the pair, but maybe…

When he smiled at her, she knew it was real. Dreams could never make her feel like this. She wasn't sure which of them closed the distance between them. Perhaps it was one desperate party, or the both acting at once. Whatever it was, she was too dazed to care.

He hated hugging (never trusted them), and so did she (gave her too much hope), yet they spent too long doing so. Breaths were few and far between as if they would speed up the moment too fast for either of their liking.

“But, I thought- I thought I wasn't supposed to see you again, sweetie.” she murmured.

“Never have been good at listening.” came his reply, voice low as hers

“Don't I know it.” she smiled softly

He interlocked fingers with her, meeting her eyes at last. That's when River knew for sure that she was standing before the man who had been through all she had. For that, she sent a silent cry of a thank you to the universe for giving her this single moment.

“You're tired.” It wasn't a question on his behalf.

She started to deny it, but held off, letting herself agree with him. He was right, after all.

“I’ll put the kettle on, then. Got some new books in the library, you know…”

She listened to him ramble on. Idiot, he was. Always would be, but he was her idiot, she supposed. River was much too distracted by the curl of his hair and the shows cast over the planes of his faces in the dim lighting. A smile ghosting her lips as she looked at him. 

Opening her mouth, River was about to speak when she was cut off by a crash that suspiciously sounded like a tea kettle shattering.

In the hallway stood none other than Nardole right behind a shattered tea kettle. The Doctor had whipped around to stare at him with a deep glare in her eyes. River was in shock over seeing her former accomplice. That was definitely not a face she had ever thought she would see again, but, then again, the universe was too funny like that.

“Are you kidding me, Nardole? You have so few jobs and you cant even balance a tea kettle you buffoon-”

“Sorry sir! I just didn't expect to see the Doctor Song on board. I thought you said…” the android said in slight defence

“Well, here I am, stunning as always.” River amended. “Now, Nardole, if you'll excuse us, I’d like to have this moment in peace.”

“But-”

“You heard her, just go,” The Doctor's voice was sharp, but River couldn't find it in herself to care.

The sound of receding footsteps and murmurs of going to talk to someone named ‘Bill’ floated to her ears. She laughed softly as he pulled him closer by their interlocked hands. Their timelines were always ebbing and flowing into one another like it was a twin helix. Sometimes painfully apart, and others deliciously close together.

“Come on, sweetie,” The Doctor began leading her somewhere (she didn't care where), and of course she followed.

“Wouldn't dream of being any place else” she hummed

Second chances were few and far between. River knew better than to let it slip through her fingers.

  
  
  


_ “I will love you if I never see you again… and I will love you if i see you every day.” _

_ -Lemony Snicket _


End file.
